How Do You Like Me Now?
By Holly Bourne
Hodder & Staughton
There’s no doubt that Tori is winning the game of life. A straight-talking, bestselling author, she’s inspired millions of women around the world with her self-help memoir. And she has the perfect relationship to boot.
But Tori Bailey has been living a lie.
Her long-term boyfriend won’t even talk about marriage, but everyone around her is getting engaged and having babies. And when her best friend Dee – her plus one, the only person who understands the madness – falls in love, suddenly Tori’s in terrifying danger of being left behind.
When the world tells you to be one thing and turning thirty brings with it a loud ticking clock, it takes courage to walk your own path. It’s time for Tori to practice what she’s preached, but the question is: is she brave enough?
This book is a very honest, raw and kind of sad account of a normal woman in her early 30s unhappy with her life. This realness and honesty throughout the book makes it funny and relatable. Throughout the book Bourne shows us through Tori’s eyes what it is like to be in your 30s, how society makes you feel lonely, unloved, weird, especially if you are not married or having children.
One minute she annoyed me she had a job as a writer and her first book has sold millions of copies, she owned a nice flat with her boyfriend and had a pretty good social life. She has what most people in their 30s dream of but never actually get.
Her constant moaning that her boyfriend didn’t want to jump on her constantly and have sex with her needy ways was like oh for gods sake. He was a pretty sweet, kind, caring, supportive boyfriend who she clearly did not love anymore but kept trying to blame him. She was the one who almost cheats, she is the one who shouts and cries at him and forces her body upon him basically demanding sex. When she had her random babbling thoughts about him and analysed his every move, this made me laugh as it is what I do a lot!!! I think a lot of women over analyse their boyfriend’s thoughts and movements and trying to guess what they are thinking. Reading this made me feel more normal!
Tori was a the epitome of wishing she was in anyone else’s shoes. She felt like she was in a rut with her life but instead of doing something about it she just moaned, drank too much wine and cried.
What was weird about this book was as much as Tori annoyed me, I also wanted the best for her. I wanted her to be happy and realise that what she had was fine, she didn’t need everyone else to validate her life choices she just had to be happy with them herself. I think I also found her annoying as I related to her, I sometimes feel a twinge of jealousy when a friend moves house or gets engaged or married, that’s human nature. But instead of turning green with jealousy and drinking a bottle of wine I am happy for my friends and get on with my own life. We all do things at different paces in life and there is no point being jealous of things that haven’t happened to you yet. Just be happy with where your life is and what you have.
I think this book really opens your eyes up about being happy with your own life and only you can make the choices that you need to do to improve it. Another eye opener of this book was social media. Tori becomes obsessed with likes on her social media, she gets upset when a certain photo gets more likes than any other. Thoughout the book she compares her life to her friends social media pages, shows what they are up to and what they are posting about such as their babies, weddings, pregnancy and jobs. Social media is a slippery slope to someone who isn’t happy with their life and I think Tori proves this in this book.
I did enjoy this book, it kind of reminded me of a modern day Bridget Jones. I bet lots of women around the world can relate to Tori’s life and her thoughts and feelings about work, relationships, friends and social media. Reading this just made me feel like I’m not the only one who thinks this way and it’s quite normal to be jealous and over think and second guess your life. Because in the end who really does know what the f**k they are doing in life? Because I sure don’t!
Thanks for reading. Katie x